Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I have complete contempt for fakery

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

The European Central Bank is almost guaranteed to cut rates. Here's what could happen next - CNBC

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t cotton to rapists

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

Bitcoin fans aren’t all sold on Trump’s meme coin - NBC News

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

The big, bad bond market could derail Trump’s big, beautiful bill - vox.com

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I have a reading level above third grade

How the Menstrual Cycle Affects ADHD - The Cut

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I can read

What is your opinion on The Beatles' impact on modern popular music? Are there any other bands with similar impacts on their genre(s)? Why them and not others?

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I know who the president of Turkey really is

Decades After Its Joint-Venture Journey Began, Hulu’s Sole Ownership By Disney “Finally Resolved” With $439M Payment To NBCU, Bob Iger Exults - Deadline

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I can count

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

Zay Flowers Is Healthy and Todd Monken Wants to Get Him the Ball More | News & Notes - Baltimore Ravens

I actually pay taxes

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

Is sunscreen toxic? The UV truthers on the internet sure think so. - The Boston Globe

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t buy bullshit

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

Have you ever had sex with your female cousin? How did it start?

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

What makes outside showers appealing? Why are they not commonly seen?

I understand how hurricane paths work

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

BTS’ Jungkook and Jimin Discharged from Korean Military After RM and V - Rolling Stone

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

Anxious-depressed individuals underestimate themselves even when they’re right - PsyPost

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

Mets and Dodgers are more than living up to heavyweight billing - New York Post

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I see through liars

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”